Friday, March 12, 2010


As I mentioned once or twice in the past, I am, in real life, a librarian for a public library system in Noo Joisey, and I am Teh Webmaster for that system and, as such, users of our web site sometimes need to contact me to tell me how totally fucking awesome our web site is - as if I didn't already know that - or to complain about how lame our online catalog is, to which I usually respond, Yeah, I have nothing to do with that, because if I did, it'd be Teh Awesome, too, but I'll send your concerns along to Teh Systems Administrator because Teh Catalog is her responsibility. But my point is, people need to be able to contact me.

So my work e-mail address is right there on the home page.

And of course it has been harvested1, which means I get like tons of spam every day2 and so I have to go through my emails and decide which are spam and which are not.

This one, which came today, would, I think, qualify as spam:

Subject Line: I sexual Russian blonde, want to see, come closer.

Hahahahahahaha! Are you sure you're Russian? Because you speak English like a Fauxlipina3!


Then the body of the spam contains a link for Beautiful Russian women.

Or possibly Russian Men in Drag.

Anyroad, one must do something to amuse oneself while deleting spam, mustn't one?

Disclaimer: No Fauxlipinas were hurt in the writing of this blog post. But when she reads it?

That's a different story!

This morning I managed a run of roughly 5.86 miles. Which MapMyFat@$$ sez burned off like 900 calories. Woo-hoo! That means I can drink like 6-7 beers with impunity tonight! Which sux, because I want to drink a case.
Added 1 p.m.: ZOMG!1! Why didn't Teh 'Mom and Teh 'Dad buy me Mr. Fucket Bucket when I was a kid?!1??

1 Which, yeah, I can't really complain about, since I'm the one who put it there. And yeah, there are ways to put e-mail links up that make them difficult to harvest, but the harvesting of e-mails was not that big a problem back when I originally added the link to my e-mail to the library's home page. And taking it down now, or making it "more secure", is pointless, because once you've been harvested, playa, you've been harvested, and even deleting the link won't diminish the amount of spam you'll get.

2 We use Micro$oft Outlook at the library, which absolutely sux at dealing with spam, but don't feel bad, Outlook! Because you're a M$ product so you also suck in a myriad of other ways. But OL is so bad that I long ago stopped turning my laptop off when I leave - even on weekends ... actually, especially on weekends - because when I get in on, say, a Monday, after two and a half days of spam-accumulation, it would literally take an hour and a half for all of the spam to download to my laptop if I hadn't left Outlook running overnight or over the weekend and thereby allow it to download the spam as it arrives, roughly every minute-and-a-half. Because Outlook, being a typically sucky M$ product, just eats up processing power when it has to download a lot of e-mail, making it nearly impossible for me to do anything else with my laptop until fucking Outlook finishes taking its spam-fed dump on my hard drive.

3 Which is kinda HAWT!1! Or should I say: "Which hawt kind is of"?

Hahahahahahahaha! I could totally pass for a Fauxlipino!


  1. The library system's ISP must suck slough water if it can't filter out at least some of that spam. Wait, maybe it already does! And you being a webmaster and all, you must have access to some cool tools (control yourself here!) to act as a front end to Outlook for filtering purposes. Even if you're a weenie, you will lready written some rules to dump email into different folders for convenient deleting.

    And yes, there is a real Leana who reads my blog.

  2. I'm catching up on GlavenWorld between office visits today...
    I LURRRVE fall.
    I will not call you a Democrat if you don't call me a Republican.
    I can't believe how quickly Ian looks so MUCH older. I hope my kid (again, assuming it's mine) doesn't grow up that fast.
    Happy gotcha day!
    My favorite post of yours so far was the first one. I can relate, but not articulate, to much of what you're thinking about the 'blog' world.
    It's GREAT to have ya back!

  3. If you cleared your work computer's cache once in a while of all the cookies & spybots that you've collected trawling all your fave porn haunts, maybe Outlook* wouldn't be so slow.

    MY Outlook never has that problem. But then again, it might be because it knows I'm Asian & won't even bother causing a problem.

    *cue heavenly choir

  4. If joyRuN's computer knows she asian, does that mean her CAR does too?

    (Female, Asian, and Driving = Not good for a car.)

  5. Bite me, warlock.

    I'm an excellent driver.

  6. And since you opened that piece of spam, how many others have now been automatically sent to you?!

    PS-Outlook doesn't "lookout" for you at all.

  7. Russian Men in Drag ain't your thing? Maybe CJ will come out of the woodwork - maybe they're his thang.

    I'm glad that I haven't been harvested, not even a little bit, not me, not my eggs, nothing. Be careful. Harvesting sounds like it could be a little painful.