Wednesday, April 28, 2010

You Pay NOW, Bitch!

This morning's run: 6.84 miles in 1:03:24 for a 9:18 pace. It was a perfect morning for a run; cold enough, at 5:20 a.m., that I wore sweatpants and a hooded sweat shirt; which may have leaned a bit toward overkill, but not too much. About a mile and a half of that was on a trail behind the local middle school, parts of which I had never been on before.

Not bad.
Now THIS (below) is just funny!

The Blargle
The Blargle is a Thing Unseen
By man (and also chicks)
A good thing too, cos it's obscene —
It has eleven dicks!
And testicles in overplus
Full twenty plus three moo-wer
Normally I never cuss,
But: Blargle, you're a WHOO-WER.
The Blargle talks in Blargle-speak,
Thus: "Glippy korkle xime!"
Words good for nothing (but to tweak
A line that needs a rhyme).
Now I will let the Blargle talk,
For nothing could be sweeter.
The Blargle says: "Ookle Ookle Ookle Ookle gauk!"
Thus fucking my poem's meter.
The Blargle drives a mini-van
As well as a light truck
That's cos the Blargle really can
Find fifty ways to suck.
O, Blargle with your multi-dicks!
You SUCK as naught else can!
(I take that back, cos Dr. Nic's
Still there in Wiscon-SAN.)
(Plus, Cletus also sucks — possibly even more than Dr. Nic — but doesn't deserve to have his suckage memorialized in verse1.)

Some thought it a Mythical Creature, something parents invoked to scare their kids into behaving — "Be Good or The Blargle will get you!" —but here we see an actual photo of The Blargle itself! It has the Head of a Chiropractor and the Pasty, Bloated Body of an Inbred Hayseed; plus it has the Ears of of a Mutant, Disneyfied Dwarf Cartoon Pachyderm of some sort ... No, wait. My bad. Those are just the Chiropractor's normal ears.
1 For the record, I was going to link all those references to inbred hicks in yesterday post to Cletus's blog, but I took pity on him after reading his ordeal with his century ride. That won't happen again.

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