And Teh 'Bride was all: "You can wait till tomorrow because we're going to see Teh 'Dad in like an hour and you just ran a race and we have nothing on tap for tomorrow."
Which was true. But I said, "No, it might rain tomorrow and I don't want to let it go for another week and this way I really won't have anything for tomorrow and I can really veg."
Of course, there's actually tons of stuff that needs to get done on days where you have "nothing to do". Today, for example, I have to
So there's my Lazy Rainy Sunday.
So far, the only part of all this that I've accomplished is this here
So time to get at it.
1 Happiest words of my life: "Today, I Am A Geezer!" O, sure, I've been referring to myself as a "geezer" for awhile, now, but that's only because all you zygotes out there don't know that "geezer" is a technical term with a very specific meaning and you're not officially a geezer until you get your first 10 mail solicitations from the AARP — which, conveniently, all come on the same day (THAT'S What SHE etc.!). Up to that point, when you call yourself a geezer, you're kinda like that guy with a Casio keyboard playing variations of "Louie Louie" who calls himself a "musician". Show me your Union Card, Poseur! Well, I am no longer a Geeseur! I am a true Geezer, because AARP wants me!
In related news, I declined to join the AARP ... 10 times (THAT's What SHE ... etc.1a!)
1a Now that I'm a real geezer, that classic line will have to follow slightly different set-up lines, such as: "Wow, I'm tired. Now that I'm in bed, all I want to do is sleep (THAT's What SHE ETC.!1!1!) or "Leave me alone! I have a headache (THAT's What SHE ETC.!1!1!) or "Leave me alone! I have a lower back issue (THAT's What SHE ETC.!1!1!) ... I could go on, but you get the point. I must make this correction because that's what post-50 realism demands. Plus, ignorant zygotes, THIS is what's known as mature comedy.
Now leave me alone! I have a ... (let's see what you people have learned):
b. Trouser pup-tent
c. Early-bird special coupon and it's nearly 4:30! Gotta hurry!
d. Rent-a-Tranny on Speed Dial
Correct answer for Typical Geezer: C.
Correct answer for me: Secret 5th option D: ALL of the above!
EAT IT, zygotes!1!
2 Now there's a classic post-AARP Geezerly TWSS!1!