Thursday, March 24, 2011

I Did Not Run Today

... though I did do some yoga, exercise and p*$$y-@$$ recumbent biking. So, you know, there's that.

The not-running today means I probably won't hit 120 miles this month, which, had I done so, would have put me at 300 for the year and thus back on pace to do 1200 by year's end. But that's okay. Unless this crappy weather continues, I should be able to make up some of that 20 mile deficit this month and as the Spring and Summer months roll in, I can chip away at it slowly, slowly, which is also how I run.

Coming up in just over a week: My first race since the Turkey Trot — a 5k along the Delaware River. I can't believe I went over 4 months without having a race, but I did. Upon further investigation, it appears I do this race-hibernation every year, so not racing after the Trot till April would seem to be status quo. At the end of April? A 15k race.

Other News

For those of you who don't read my tweets, the H'berg family just got an iPad and WiFi. This was Teh 'Bride's idea and project so it happened quickly; whereas when I wanted to upgrade from 56k dial-up to broadband a year or two ago, I had to go on a pilgrimage and slay a dragon first1. In any case, she ansd Ian spent most of yesterday downloading apps, one of which was for me — the compleat works of one Wm Shxpr. So last night I was reading the 5th act of Cymbeline — which is the play I'm on now (and when I finish it, there will be only one more that I haven't read, viz., Two Noble Kinsmen, which will be next) — in bed on the iPad and thus for the first time was not in danger  of being crushed to death by Teh Riverside Shxpr, which weighs roughly infinity.

So ... win-win, right?

Wrong. Because the WiFi signal reaces up there to the bedroom all the way from the basement (as it ought to) and so after reading like ONE scene of Cymbeline, I was, of course, tweeting2, watching Funny or Die videos, and just generally fucking off on the Interwebs.

At this rate, I may never get to Two Noble Kinsmen.

Those of you who have noticed that I haven't posted anything on Shxpr in awhile and wish I would — or as I like to call you collectively, "Teh Null Set" —should take comfort (or more likely "take to the hills") because I will be writing something about Cymbeline pretty soon.

That's a threat. And I always follow through on my threats.

1 I may have accidentally gone on a dragonage1a and slain a Pilgrim instead, but it's all good. Fucking Pilgrim has it coming, always strutting around with that cool hat with the buckle on it!1!

1a Word o' teh Day: "Dragonage": A pilgrimage in drag; usually undertaken by acolytes of Teh Church of Teh Poison Mind, whose High Priestesses are Boy George and RBR, whom you never see in the same room at the same time NOT because they are one and the same person but rather because they share the same wardrobe:

2 This here, by the way, is what it was so important for me to tweet last night:

"Tweet from bed, b*tches!! With wifi!1!1"

See what you're missing, non-followers?


  1. Thanks for not going to the mill and trotting out some lame exuce for your lack of running. I'm sure you have a good one. P*$$y. I know, I know, you were probably busy tweeting Ariel V...

  2. ...and for those of you not in teh know, "exuce" is twit speak for "excuse"

  3. I exuce you from not running, which I know that you only abstained from to make me feel better about not exercising yes it IS all about me help help this sentence is running away with me why do my words run more than I do?

  4. I'm out of "exuces" for not running. Har te har.

    Sounds like you're very high tech these days. An iPad!!! Woo hoo!!! I wants one, too!

    PS. Thanks for the bacon motivation. So thoughtful.

  5. Wow. Peachy's backwoods spelling of "exuce" seems to be catching on. Therefore I won't bother to say, "Bea shur to stai en skool, kidz!"

  6. I didn't run yesterday and may not today. I also didn't have sex with roadkill and didn't get elected Pope. I didn't think of posting all the things I didn't do, either.

    Your presence on blogs seems to have dwindled since the Twitter account. Perhaps the equipment upgrade may change that. Or maybe your presence has been lacking because you haven't figured out how to comment without things "getting eaten up;" a problem not one other person has had - so, Mr. I.T. guy, try following all the steps (I know, I know, that word verification thing is tricky for you) for a change.

  7. I, for one, am holding my breath waiting for the next comments on Shakespeare. I am also waiting for the good space aliens to show up and take over the management of this planet from the corporations and their minions in Congress and in the Pentagon.

  8. Yeah, as you know I just did my first "race" the Sat before last. Race hibernation seems to be the norm for the upper "right coast" :(.

    Maybe "Larry the Lighthouse" will be out of hibernation, too.

    That's a funny thought--G in bed with an iPad!

    Yeah, bring on more Shxpr--you haven't been a dick in a while. Plus, Granny needs brain cell and vocabulary stimulation or she forgets everything.

  9. I was weighing whether to get an iPad or a Kindle and you helped me decided...I KNOW I would screw around and never read if I had the iPad, so Kindle it is! (by the way...I'm alive, just figuring out my life. Ha!)

    lil sis